Welcome back my friends. Once again this is the one and only Quiet Mouse. I have had success with my past blogs on driving issues and today I want to open your mind to a few more things that I find asinine. Maybe I can wake up a few people from their haze of stupidity?
I cannot agree more with the statement of FACT that it would indeed be nice if everyone KNEW and followed the rules of the road. It is the source of immeasurable amounts of irritation when some a$$hole pulls in front of your car and jams on the brakes when there is no one behind you for any discernible distance. It can be quite the frustration when the next lane over is moving fast, so you move over to get in the "fast" moving lane, only for it to stop at a dead standstill. Are there really that many cars on the road for there to warrant a standstill? Or is it merely the fact that boner head next to you is so absorbed in his own bullshit or overly loud music to get in the proper lane? Did the exits suddenly move from right to left side of the highway? Is there some unforeseen accident up ahead where one dick nose redneck rear ended another?
All these possibilities and more are no doubt going through your head as you pound vigorously on the steering wheel, cussing, screaming, and acting like a fool. Perhaps you have seen this person in the vehicle next to you? Perhaps it has been YOU on occasion? Does your next heart attack or brain aneurysm have the Honda in front of yous license plate on it?
One of the worst areas for my personal rage meter to shoot shit onto the fan is in the PARKING LOT (especially at the VA). Have you seen these parking lot menaces? I think, sometimes privately and sometimes openly, that these people who walk out in front of a moving vehicle WANT to be hit. It wouldn't surprise me in this country where everyone is so eager to file litigation's to get some money for NOTHING. It could be the fact that they are also too busy on their cell phone or conversation to notice the obvious fact that THEY are the one impeding the flow of traffic; then THEY want to look at ME like I am the ASSHOLE???
It is another irony that in this country how many people are against the ownership of guns, but yet, they are okay with driving a 2500 pound missile recklessly down the road with no forethought of the pedestrians or other drivers on the road. WHAT IS THIS, San Francisco? NO, it is not!
Best advice I can honestly give is to GET SOME SLEEP!
But Quiet Mouse... I thought this blog was about road rage and driving?
Of course it is. Over 100,000 automobile accidents are caused every year by people who are sleep impaired, often under the influence of drugs like ALCOHOL and CAFFEINE (both the REAL gateway drugs). Lack of sleep can also be the SOURCE of irritability, stupidity, and inattentiveness to the road. Driving is NOT a passive task. It requires ALL of your attention, not just a mere fraction of concentration.
But lets get back to these parking lot menaces for a moment or two with a HUGE point I want to make, so please pay attention...
IF IT IS TOO BIG FOR YOU TO HANDLE AND DRIVE... GET THAT HUGE GAS GUZZLING PIECE OF SHIT OFF THE ROAD!!!
There is a major issue in this country of PENIS ENVY!!
Look it's okay that the average penis in the the world is about 4.5 inches. But listen here TEX, you do NOT need to constantly overcompensate for the stack of dimes in your pants!!
It is bad enough that MEN have to overcompensate in this way, but even WORSE when it is a timid woman behind the wheel of this monstrosity who can barely see over the steering wheel. THEN, they always have to put a set of fake TESTICLES under the bumper?? Who are you trying to fool, POSER??
We don't need any more over-sized, ego boosting trucks for all the insecure mommas boys out there.
If you are a FARMER and need a truck to work in the field, FINE... but if you live in the suburbs and are trying to keep up with the Joneses, then too big is just plain ridiculous and YOU are a menace to the road.
If you find yourself becoming a ticking time-bomb of rage and fury, perhaps it is time to re-analyze the current situation. Doing the same things over and over again and expecting different results is the very definition of INSANITY!!
What good is it to drive yourself to the point of CRAZY?
Can the other person hear you? Doubtful
Is the boiling of your elevated blood pressure really worth the cost of both your mental and physical health? Not likely...
So why do we do it? Sometimes taking the bus is much easier, time efficient, and soooo much less stressful.
Plan accordingly and leave early. Eat breakfast before you go to work, get enough sleep the night before...
All so you are NOT this insanely menacing jack-off on the road waving your hand with the one-finger-salute!
Parking lot assholes are annoying, especially with the aging population, many of whom should NOT have their licenses renewed, but rather REMOVED.
There is this little book down at the DMV that tells you the exact rules of the road, not just the SPEED SUGGESTION (limit)!
Slow down. Ease back on the stress. Take it easy on the steering wheel... IT DID NOTHING WRONG.
This has been the Quiet Mouse. Have fun out there on the road. Play your music as loud as you want, just try to be respectful of those around you.
Peace. Love. Truth. Respect. Calm down and breathe.
You forgot to mention the jackwalks that get on their cell phones and end up going way belllloooow the speed limit, fail to signal, yield, stop, hit cats, etc. I was behind some goof today who changed lanes suddenly with no signal because she realized she needed to get over to get on the freeway, no, wait, she didn't mean to go North, so she swerved over again and almost hit some lady who was on her phone..
ReplyDeleteAnd hey, who said the lady behind the wheel of a penis envy truck is timid? Maybe she's tougher than you??? Don't hate! :-)
You Tell'em Tiger! I so totally agree! :-)
ReplyDeleteBryce goes 55 in a 60. Just sayin'...love ya babe.
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